Next Time

I keep writing on these walls hoping to make them fall.
Maybe I was just too slow to figure it out.
Some things can’t be undone.
You’re surprised that I care the way that I do and quite frankly I am too.
It took some time to get my bearings.
I can’t explain the kind of pain that never hurts.
You made me feel like a placeholder when I thought I was second to none.
My decision was in reaction to the lack of consideration you showed me.
Love can’t be calculated, so don’t go pushing buttons, love is not a game.
If I could change the ending to this story I would, but it is what it is.
I’ve been told to keep my mouth shut, but that’s just no way to live.
Don’t tell me how to live or love.
My heart knows what it wants.

Things sure look a lot better in retrospect, don’t they?
Living in the past only gets you so far though.
In this age of reflection, being alone is a blessing.
The sum of my beliefs is all the company I need.
I won’t run from one mistake right into another one.
I’ve made up my mind.
It feels good, I can’t wait to start anew.
One thing I won’t be tonight, is alone.
I’m through looking back at what I can’t have.
I’ve been told to keep my heart tightly guarded, but that’s just no way to live.
I’ve got to let go and get away.

Yes, it’s a risk to go it alone, but freedom always comes at a price.
I know how fragile I can be, but I won’t be held back no more.
We fell out of what we fell into, call it a lesson learned.
Some live to love and I’d love to live like them.
At the end of the day I know what my truth is.
Love shouldn’t be an afterthought.
I used to be afraid of letting go.
Life is meant for living, so that’s what I’m gonna do.
Good things are coming, sooner than you know.
I can’t wait to start anew.
I’m gonna get it right next time.

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Categories: Poetry | Tags: , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , | 3 Comments

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3 thoughts on “Next Time

  1. I used to be afraid of letting go, too. I used to cling so tightly to the one I loved, giving and giving, getting nothing in return. When I went through my last breakup, I took a look around and saw that I had nothing. Nothing in my apartment- I had moved in with too many people, and lost things that I once had- and nothing in my heart. Nothing left to give. No trust to give, or to recieve. I knew that I couldn’t make the mistake of rushing back into something with someone again, no matter how much it took the pain away. So I started anew… and it does feel good. I have my days though, where I wish someone would come along and take away this pain. But then, I realize that it’s MY pain, and I can’t give it to anyone else. I should be a little more appreciative of it, I suppose… because it does in fact mean that I am alive. 🙂

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    • Thanks for joining me, my friend. We might not always agree or feel the same, but we’re gonna live life and we’re gonna love every bit of it. I’m glad found you, I’ll be looking out for you because you’re good.

      Take care.

      Like

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