Life On Standby

Honestly my honesty gets the best of me sometimes.
I say things that never should’ve left the walls of my mind.
In time I hoped that my tongue although young & naïve would’ve known better by now.
Better than my mind that thinks it knows everything.
Better than my heart that feels for anything with a pulse.
And better than my body with it’s scars and tired moves.
I’m fading fast, but there’s still some use in trying.

I’ve said too much this time.
When nothing came out, I should’ve stopped there.
But I pushed on and did not know where the finish line was.
All I know is that I feel, what I feel is irrelevant at this point.
Such single-minded pursuit, I’ve seen it all & it keeps leaving me needing you.
Wait for clarity, for a moment, for a certainty that you can’t find.
To seek, to learn, to know & to follow through with this motion fueled by such emotions as these.
I was supposed to wait.

I am not looking for a tell to give me a sign.
Don’t try to explain to me what can only be felt.
Hold it right there until I get it.
I don’t understand what’s happening to us.
I just want to know how you feel, we’re just wasting time.
You wish that I could understand what you’ve been through.
We’re past the point of no return, destination’s unknown.
The floodgates have opened.
I’ve tried to outrun this realization.
You’re the one I’m thinking of.

Everything I am and everything I could ever hope to be is standing before me.
I am willing & waiting.
This is where I let all of my defenses down.
I know that I should move on.
Nothing comes without a cost, so here we are again.
Something has changed.
Let’s leave it at that for now.

Posted with WordPress for BlackBerry.

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Categories: Poetry | Tags: , , , , , , , , , | 4 Comments

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4 thoughts on “Life On Standby

  1. trjensen

    I swear you are in my brain. I can really relate to this. Thank you for sharing.

    Like

    • And I can relate to you Teri. I thought I subscribed to your blog before, anyway now its official! You’ll be better than okay, just give it some time hun. Love ya.

      Like

  2. Oh this is something so personal; yet, it is something that many have felt, but perhaps they haven’t expressed it so eloquently as you have just done.

    Like

  3. Love your POETICSOUL!

    Like

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