You Again

I’m reaching in the dark for the light in you.

When the Sun goes out in your eyes I miss the you I’ve grown to love.
I get nervous when you’re gone.
I hear your voice, but you don’t feel the same.
Where did you go?

I’m reaching in the dark for the light in you.
Look at me when you feel out of touch.
Stay with me.
I will never let you go.

When your thoughts are not your own, know that you are not alone.
I don’t know all the answers, but you, I do know.
Find yourself in this quiet moment with me.
We’ve been here before in this familiar feeling.

You lost yourself in your search to find something you left behind.
I saw a glimmer of someone I used to know in your eyes.
A picture painted in our precious memories.
Never surrender who you are, don’t lose that spark.

Give me your pain until you know the meaning of love.
Rescue these fragile dreams and start again.
With or without directions find your way.
Come back, come back to me.

It’s alright, you’re alright.
It’s you again.

Special Thanks To:
Semira

A Little Loss & A Lot Of Love

Have you ever felt like you didn’t have the right to feel the way you do?

When everyone around you seems to be having the time of their lives it feels wrong or selfish to admit that you’re not. You are truly happy for them, but whatever is going on in your life is weighing you down so you can’t fully commit to the moment. That’s how I felt a few days ago.

I attended my Nephew’s wedding and I couldn’t fully enjoy the moment with him and our family. I smiled, cracked jokes and I really am proud of him, but part of me was and is still distracted by this tinge of sadness.

Our cat Sundae had a stroke and died Friday while I was on my way to the wedding. Learning of her death while I was at this momentous occasion filled me with this odd mixture of happiness and grief all at the same time. I’m smiling while I’m on the verge of crying, and hugging my family all the while thinking about hugging my friends/roommates who were there at Sundae’s time of death. Life is funny that way.

In the same day I was able to embrace my family in a moment of pure joy and then hold my friends as we sobbed and mourned together at our mutual loss. Happiness turned into sadness and then frustration by the end of the day. The highs and lows of life are not lost on me.

I wanted to write about this earlier, but I figured who was I to talk or write about a little loss? I don’t want to distract from or steal anyone’s joy, so I didn’t message or call (typical). Don’t worry I’ve got Netflix, junk food and tea, so I’ll be fine. We will all be fine eventually.

I just needed to air out a few thoughts. Thanks for reading, if you’ve made it this far.

Becoming (Lost In Everything)

Let your heart break into something more…

What’s left to find when you’ve lost your way?
Everything weighs heavy on your mind
Sometimes we lose our place in line
And what we wanted yesterday doesn’t seem to get any closer

What’s left to find when you’ve lost it all?
There’s a disconnect from the expectations we’ve laid out before us
It’s not that you don’t want to do the things you say
You just get lost in everything
That’s problem with promises, because no one knows what tomorrow hides

When the Sun goes down we will disconnect from the day that’s had its way with us
We can reconnect with our simple ways, eye to eye, oh so quietly
And if the night finds us together, we can leave our loneliness behind, hand in hand

Let your heart break into something more
In loss there can be freedom
Get rid of everything
Make amends with what you’ve done
And after it is done, you’ll find room to enjoy what you’ve become
Let tomorrow set you free & start again

Quotes: Dreams

“Thunder only happens when it’s raining.
Players only love you when they’re playing.
They say, women, they will come and they will go.
When the rain washes you clean, you’ll know
You will know.” – Fleetwood Mac (Dreams)

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Stain

How do I get this stain out?
Out of the ground I walk on.
Out of my system.
Out of my life.

Ratio of three to one.
Three lines crossed against this one life.
Trust, dignity & truth versus everything I knew.
It’s soaked deep into the pores, into the very fabric of who I’ve become.
I don’t want this bloodstained floor you’ve walked all over to colour who I am.

You filled me with regret until I could take no more.
Hoping that no one would see, every time I dried my tears.
There is nothing left for you to take.
Nothing you can do.
I will remove this blemish, but first I have to get rid of you.

Posted with WordPress for BlackBerry.