Faded Father

“In Your Shadow I Can Shine” by Paperdol

I never knew you & not sure if I want to.
Learning about you just might change everything.
But that’s not my fear, it’s “what if nothing changes at all?”
I can face my fears, but I’m done with disappointment.
Let downs are like put downs, it’s just that you’re not around to actually deliver the blows.
What little I know of you might just be fiction.
Memories fade & restoring them takes so much out of me.
I’m nothing like you & yet I’m stuck in your skin.
You made me, aren’t you proud?
No, I’m my own creation.
You had little to nothing to do with who I am now.
Some dreams are right & some dreams are so wrong.
Four out of twenty seven isn’t enough to dilute or dissuade me.
I used to wonder about nature versus nurture everytime I looked at my reflection.
I no longer do those things.
My mind & my DNA have changed without exposure to your ways.
I’ve built up an immunity to your shadow & the way it hangs over me.
It all comes down to who I want to be, I can see that clearly now.
I am not you, I am me.

Posted with WordPress for BlackBerry.

Called It

Don’t leave me hanging.

I didn’t call you cus I got caught up.
You didn’t come around just as expected.
Dates rearrange & promises fall through.
It’s nothing new to someone & everything to a few.
It’s no fault of our own when we can’t come through it seems.

Call it a convenience whenever we’re in the mood.
Love lasts for now, tomorrow’s another question.
Don’t ask me for answers because they elude me just like you.
I’ve stopped caring, it was bound to happen eventually.
That ringing in your ear isn’t coming from me.
I’m not calling your name.

What we are is wasting away.
It’s about time one of us walked away.
Give it up & give in.
Or go on pretending everything’s the same.
The chase is tiring.
Give it up & give in.
Or go on & quit back peddling.

Give it up or go on.
But don’t leave me hanging.
Hang up your dreams & try your call again.
It’s no longer your call, a decision’s been made.
I had a moment of silence for what never was.
Give it up & go on, as though yesterday was just a fever dream.

Posted with WordPress for BlackBerry.

Deeper

She knows that I can’t help it
That’s why she stays away
She’s not running, but she might as well be
Its like she can read my mind, but still she doesn’t comprehend a thing
How I feel isn’t all that complicated
But I don’t think that’s what you want

Its been a long time coming
I didn’t ask for this
But now that I’m in it
I can’t break out & I don’t want to
So let me fall
Deeper
Deeper in you

Just let me close my eyes
There’s nothing to see here
Don’t you think that I’ve thought this over about a million times a day?
No matter what I still reach the same conclusion
I still want you, I’m sure you know this by now
So what’s the hold up?
We’ve both got things to do

Its about time one of us said something
I didn’t ask for this
But if its not what you want
Just say so & let me go
Don’t let me fall
Deeper
Deeper alone

If I can’t change my love for you
You’re never going to change
Has it ever crossed your mind, all that we could be?
I’ve tried to walk away
Sometimes we do crazy things that we don’t mean
You should know
But you wouldn’t believe me

Its about time I came down
Cloud nine, man down
I don’t want to live in a fantasy
Be real with me; don’t run from the truth
Don’t let me fall
Deeper
Deeper alone

She knows that I can’t help it

Posted with WordPress for BlackBerry.